Action v rom-coms this time it's personal

January 31, 2010

The other evening I settled down in the lounge to watch Die Hard 4.0.

Not quite up to the standard of a must-see film at the cinema, never-the-less it makes for a relaxing two hours of TV as, like comfort food, it gently washes over me.

Then in pops the present Mrs Lowe, glass of wine in one hand, iPhone in the other, to see what we are watching.

I eagerly tell her what is just about to start and her face suddenly takes on the appearance of a slapped backside.

She gave me a withering stare and, I can only say, harrumphed.

Watching what she calls a 'dick film' is not what she had in mind.

I point out all the 'chick films' we wade through like treacle, such as Notting Hill, Mamma Mia and Sex in the City. She responds they are different because they have a plot line that does not involve a man in a dirty t-shirt killing brain-dead gangsters by the dozen while swearing profusely.

A plot line, say I, with one eyebrow raised, a la the third best James Bond. Some gorgeous woman finds a man, beds him, loses him, gets him back.

This argument, which sadly does not really deserve the title debate, rumbles on and I am saved only by the mother-in-law phoning. One more reason why a man should not live close to his mother-in-law.

I hear the wife say 'guess what he is watching', then nothing more than a high-pitched twitter until the film is well underway and bodies are littering the streets of Washington.

This difference in taste regarding films does underline quite clearly why men are from Mars and women from Venus. I have yet to meet a man, at least a straight man, who enjoys what passes for romantic comedy these days.

Yes, when the likes of Cary Grant and Bette Davies were spitting barbed comments like warring cobras, there was genuine entertainment, but the modern, anodyne versions of 'rom-com', which sadly often involve the other Grant, make party political broadcasts look entertaining.

I admit that boys' all-action films have lost a bit too, mainly because the commercial demands make them so predictable.

Film companies use a sample audience to look at alternative endings and always pick the one where the good guy lives and heads off into the sunset in a battered old station wagon complete with child/woman/dog.

They are heading for the backwoods of the USA, where he can go fishing and hunting to forget his last ordeal and previous existence as a top Government agent until the next time he is pulled out of retirement.

There has often been a British film tradition where there is a not so happy ending, as in The Long Good Friday or Get Carter. There are also ambiguous endings, such as the inimitable Italian Job. But not for Hollywood, where evil must be vanquished and seen to be vanquished.

There are of course cross-over films, where me and the present Mrs Lowe can sit on the sofa and enjoy the experience together. But even these have rules. There must be a good plot, a bit of action, a few jokes, a hunky lead and some romance. And not a dirty t-shirt or pony tail in sight.

■ DRIVING instructors are complaining that learners are no longer given any courtesy on the road.

Historically drivers would show some patience towards learner drivers, as we have all been there.

This is no longer the case as they receive the range of bad manners that has become the norm when driving these days.

Whether it is blocking junctions, not letting other cars in or sitting in the outside lane while doing a comfy 50 miles an hour, there is often little respect or consideration for other car users.

The other evening I was stuck in a Bedford street as the car in front had parked in the middle of the road while picking someone up, rather than pulling into the kerb.

Sadly, I cannot see it improving.